Key: Gb major
Verse 1
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It
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was the blackest night
There was no moon in sight
You know the stars ain't shinin'
'Cause the sky's too tight
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I heard the scary wind
I seen some ugly trees
There was a werewolf honkin'
I'm mean 'n I'm bad,
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why'know I ain't no sissy
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name of Chrissy
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bike 'n me . . .
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'N this ride up the Mountain of Mystery,
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Verse 2
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I noticed even the crickets
Were actin' weird up here
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'N so I figured I might
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I said, "Gimme summa that
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what yer suckin' on . . . "
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'Cause she was gone . . .
Verse 3
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"Where's those titties I like so well,
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Is what I started to yell,
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Like a crunchin' twig,
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He's about this big . . .
Verse 4
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He had a red suit on
An' a widow's peak
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An' then a pointed tail
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Yes, it was him alright,
I sweared I knowed it was
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He had some human flesh
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Y'know, it looked to me
Like it was titty skin
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I said, "You son of a bitch!"
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Well he just got out his floss
'N started cleanin' his fang
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So I shot him with my shooter,
Verse 5
'n said:
You know, I ate her all up . . . now
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what you gonna say?
Chrissy?
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Bozzio: Titties 'n all!
boy?
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Frank: Shit,
Bozzio: Yes, this is true.
Frank: Don't they pay you good
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come through . . .
Frank: Well I want my Chrissy,
'N I want my beer
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So you just barf it back up
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motorcycle man!
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Do you un derstand?
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Titties and beer?
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little contract here . . .
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Son- of- a- whore
Bozzio: Don't call me that!
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on I learned writin' for . . .
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yer ass I will sign . . .
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in' time!
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. . . you ain't that bad . . .
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that I've had . . .
Frank: Oh, yeah?
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'N both of those suckers was
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Frank: Well, let's make a deal
if you think that's true
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I mean,
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Whatcha gonna do?
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Bozzio: Wait a minute . . . a tinge of doubt
Verse 6
crosses my mind when
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you say that you want to make a deal with me . . .
Frank: That's very,
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Bozzio: Wait . . . you ain't supposed to want
to make a deal with me
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Frank: Ah, but I'm slightly different than your av erage customer,
Devil . . .
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Bozzio: But, wait . . . but most people don't want
Frank: Yeah . . .
Bozzio: What's your story?
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Frank: Well, most people are afraid of you, see? They don't know how stupid you are . . . I happen
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to know that you jack off to a picture of Punky Meadows when you get home . . .
Bozzio: Grrarh . . . Stupid
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Frank: You know . . . ever since that guy told you that he contained more fluid than Jeff Beck you've been tryin' to outdo him . . . Awright, look, I'm gonna say one thing to you . . . this may not register right away, but let me say this . . . leave your pickle alone for a couple of nights, you know what I mean . . . ? Now, come on! I'm only interested in a couple of things . . . (Wait, is that a note for me? Is somebody passing me a note? What does this say . . . ? "Frank,
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please do me a favour, I can't find a brother of mine, I could dig it if you could call him from stage. His name is Dirty Tom Nomads M.C.," signed "Thanks, Bear" or "Bean," I can't tell . . . Well, if he's out there . . . Dirty Tony De La Nomads M.C. get in touch with Bean or Bear . . .) And as I was sayin', Devil, I'm an average sort of a person, I'm . . . you wouldn't believe it, but . . . I'm very much like the people here in this audience tonight . . .
Bozzio: What?
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Frank: I think we definitely have
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Bozzio: Wait a minute, I thought you had funny things growing in your hair an d all that
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other stuff . . . I thought . . . write weird music, you know, I thought . . .
Frank: Listen . . .
shit, you know?
. . .
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Bozzio: . . . big titty chic that you just had out here with the camera,
I mean, you know . . .
Frank: Listen carefully to me,
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oh, Devil . . .
Frank: I'm only interested
Frank: See if you can
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Bozzio: I would think . . . uh . . . let's see,
maybe . . . uh . . .
Bozzio: Stravinsky
. . . and, uh . . .
Frank: I'll give you two
Bozzio: . . . let's see . . . uh . . .
Bozzio: What?
Frank: Let go of your pickle!
my pickle
Frank: Well, who's
holding your pickle then?
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Bozzio: I don't know . . . ha! She's out in the audience . . . Hey, Dale,
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would you like to come up here and hold my pickle to satisfy this weird man out here on the stage?
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call it a pickle . . .
Ray: Ha ha ha!
Bozzio: Oh, no . . .
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Frank: I don't . . . I hate . . . I hate to squeal on you, Bozzio, I mean,
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Devil . . . but, look, I'm only interested in two things . . .
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Bozzio: Now, wait a minute . . . all I have to say is God help me! . . . Even
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though I have this . . . this fucking mask on . . .
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Frank: Ha ha ha ha ha . . . ! Listen, if you think that mask looks bad,
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you oughta see his pickle . . . I'm only interested in two things, that's titties and beer, you know what I mean?
Frank: Yeah . . .
Bozzio: Titties and beer?
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Frank: Titties and beer, titties and beer, titties and beer, titties and beer, titties and beer,
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titties and beer, titties and beer, titties an d beer . . .
Bozzio: (Growling) Whoa, I don't know
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Frank: . . . titties and beer, titties and beer,
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titties and beer . . .
Verse 7
Frank: Alright!
Bozzio: Hold on a second, boy . . .
'Cause that's Magic Ink!
Verse 8
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let go of his pickle
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'N out jumped m'girl
They heard the titties PLOP- PLOPPIN'
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"I GOT ME THREE BEERS 'N
A FIST FULLA DOWNS,
SO FUCK YOU CLOWNS!"
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Then she gave us the finger,
It was rigid 'n stiff,
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That's when the Devil, he farted
An' she went right over the cliff
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(Whoa . . . Tinsel
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Time!)
I took off to my pad
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I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
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I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
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I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
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I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
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I swear I do de . . .
Verse 9
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Alright, Well, yeah, that's enough of the Devil and his famous pickle, we're going to make another dramatic,
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if... if, somewhat... rickety segue into another song called Cruising for Burgers, wait a minute...
Outro 1
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How did you like the song?
TunerE A D G B E
ChordsD G C Dm
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