Soap Opera chords by
Rupert Holmes
Rupert Holmes
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Key: B minor
Intro 1
F#
F#

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E
E

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C
C

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Verse 1
Fm
Fm

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There was a time when I saw
Db
Db

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myself a flood- lit figure on the stage
Fm
Fm

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The Metropolitan Opera,
Eb
Eb

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the Daily Critic's latest rage
Bbm
Bbm

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Cm
Cm

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But my voice went through a change
Dm
Dm

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Ebm
Ebm

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about the same time as my skin
Eb
Eb

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Cm
Cm

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Fm
Fm

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Now the op era is gone and what
Gm
Gm

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Cm
Cm

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is left is getting awfully thin
Fm
Fm

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Verse 2
There was a time when I saw myself
Db
Db

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a superstar upon the stage
Fm
Fm

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In someone's rock and roll opera,
Eb
Eb

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but then my throat began to age
Bbm
Bbm

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Cm
Cm

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And I wound up working nights with
Dm
Dm

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Ebm
Ebm

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afternoons when I'm awake
Eb
Eb

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Cm
Cm

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Fm
Fm

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Gm
Gm

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So I watch the daily dramas as my life
Cm
Cm

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becomes a coffee break
Fm
Fm

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Verse 3
F
F

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Here's the story up to date
Dm
Dm

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Shirley's found another mate
Am
Am

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Though she'll wind up with
Cm
Cm

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Eb
Eb

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her husband in the end
Bb
Bb

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But her husband's got no life
Gm
Gm

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He can't make it with his wife
Cm
Cm

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Though his secretary's more
F
F

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than just his friend
Verse 4
F
F

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It's a day- to- day routine and
Dm
Dm

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I watch the TV screen
Am
Am

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Letting Bob and Shirley
Cm
Cm

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live my life for me
Bb
Bb

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It's an opera made of soap using
Gm
Gm

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oth er people's hope
Cm
Cm

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And to morrow's show ain't
Fm
Fm

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soon enough for me
Verse 5
Fm
Fm

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There was a time when I saw myself
Db
Db

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a clean- cut cowboy on the screen
Fm
Fm

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A spurs- and- saddle horse opera,
Eb
Eb

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but that's a long- forgotten dream
Bbm
Bbm

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Cm
Cm

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So I watch Let's Make a Deal
Dm
Dm

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Ebm
Ebm

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and win the jackpot in my brain
Cm
Cm

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Fm
Fm

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Then it's time to watch the show that's
Gm
Gm

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Cm
Cm

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got my cerebellum half insane
Fm
Fm

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Verse 6
F
F

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Here's the story down to earth
Dm
Dm

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Shirley's finally given birth
Am
Am

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She's been carrying the
Eb
Eb

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Cm
Cm

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baby for a year
Eb
Eb

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Bb
Bb

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Though it don't belong to Bob
Gm
Gm

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Who's been fired from
Cm
Cm

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his job as a surgeon
F
F

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'Cause he's got this sudden fear
Verse 7
F
F

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He can't stand the sight of blood
Dm
Dm

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Meanwhile Shirley's mining Judd
Am
Am

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Who's the father of the kid
Cm
Cm

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Eb
Eb

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Cm
Cm

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but he won't give
Bb
Bb

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And tomorrow's show will say
Gm
Gm

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what they left out yesterday
Cm
Cm

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F
F

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And that gives me one good reason I should live
Bb
Bb

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Gm
Gm

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Interlude 1
Bbm
Bbm

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Gdim
Gdim

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Bbm
Bbm

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F
F

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D
D

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Gdim
Gdim

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Cm
Cm

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Fm
Fm

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F
F

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Here's the story
Verse 8
in a shell
Dm
Dm

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Bobby's mind is shot to hell
Am
Am

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'Cause he can't recall
Cm
Cm

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his name or how he feels
Eb
Eb

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Bb
Bb

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He's a lost amnesiac
Gm
Gm

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Cm
Cm

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While his wife is in the back of her station
F
F

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wagon notching up her heels
Verse 9
F
F

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Meanwhile Bob's assistant nurse
Dm
Dm

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has some poison in her purse
Am
Am

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And she's gonna slip into
Cm
Cm

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Shirley's soup
Bb
Bb

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Good old Judd thought up the scheme
Gm
Gm

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Good old Judd is Shirley's dream
Cm
Cm

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But old Judd don't want
F
F

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to share her chicken coop
Verse 10
F
F

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And the nurse would like to keep Shirley's
Dm
Dm

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Am
Am

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body six feet deep in her grave
C
C

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Cm
Cm

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And chase him to the Baltic Sea
Bb
Bb

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For she sees herself his wife to poor Bob
Gm
Gm

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Cm
Cm

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Who's found a life as a farmer
F
F

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since he lost his memory
Verse 11
F
F

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So to give a resume
Dm
Dm

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Bobby's bailing up the hay
Am
Am

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C
C

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While his wife is in the straw
Cm
Cm

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Eb
Eb

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with Bill and Fred
Bb
Bb

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But she don't feel great inside
Gm
Gm

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Cm
Cm

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It's that dose of cyanide that the nurse and
F
F

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Judd will feed her til she's dead
Verse 12
F
F

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There's a baby who just grew
Dm
Dm

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fifteen years in only two
F
F

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Am
Am

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C
C

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And she has her eyes on
Cm
Cm

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Judd who is her dad
Eb
Eb

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Bb
Bb

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But of course she can't know that
She just knows just where it's at
As her mother says,
"It's good to be so glad"

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TunerE A D G B E
ChordsF# E C Fm Db...

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