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Soap Opera chords by 
Rupert Holmes
N/A•
Intro 1
G#
F#
D
Verse 1
Gm
There was a time when I saw
Eb
myself a flood- lit figure on the stage
Gm
The Metropolitan Opera,
F
the Daily Critic's latest rage
Cm
Dm
But my voice went through a change
Em
Fm
about the same time as my skin
F
Dm
Gm
Now the op era is gone and what
Am
Dm
is left is getting awfully thin
Gm
Verse 2
There was a time when I saw myself
Eb
a superstar upon the stage
Gm
In someone's rock and roll opera,
F
but then my throat began to age
Cm
Dm
And I wound up working nights with
Em
Fm
afternoons when I'm awake
F
Dm
Gm
Am
So I watch the daily dramas as my life
Dm
becomes a coffee break
Gm
Verse 3
G
Here's the story up to date
Em
Shirley's found another mate
Bm
Though she'll wind up with
Dm
F
her husband in the end
C
But her husband's got no life
Am
He can't make it with his wife
Dm
Though his secretary's more
G
than just his friend
Verse 4
G
It's a day- to- day routine and
Em
I watch the TV screen
Bm
Letting Bob and Shirley
Dm
live my life for me
C
It's an opera made of soap using
Am
oth er people's hope
Dm
And to morrow's show ain't
Gm
soon enough for me
Verse 5
Gm
There was a time when I saw myself
Eb
a clean- cut cowboy on the screen
Gm
A spurs- and- saddle horse opera,
F
but that's a long- forgotten dream
Cm
Dm
So I watch Let's Make a Deal
Em
Fm
and win the jackpot in my brain
Dm
Gm
Then it's time to watch the show that's
Am
Dm
got my cerebellum half insane
Gm
Verse 6
G
Here's the story down to earth
Em
Shirley's finally given birth
Bm
She's been carrying the
F
Dm
baby for a year
F
C
Though it don't belong to Bob
Am
Who's been fired from
Dm
his job as a surgeon
G
'Cause he's got this sudden fear
Verse 7
G
He can't stand the sight of blood
Em
Meanwhile Shirley's mining Judd
Bm
Who's the father of the kid
Dm
F
Dm
but he won't give
C
And tomorrow's show will say
Am
what they left out yesterday
Dm
G
And that gives me one good reason I should live
C
Am
Interlude 1
Cm
Adim
Cm
G
E
Adim
Dm
Gm
G
Here's the story
Verse 8
in a shell
Em
Bobby's mind is shot to hell
Bm
'Cause he can't recall
Dm
his name or how he feels
F
C
He's a lost amnesiac
Am
Dm
While his wife is in the back of her station
G
wagon notching up her heels
Verse 9
G
Meanwhile Bob's assistant nurse
Em
has some poison in her purse
Bm
And she's gonna slip into
Dm
Shirley's soup
C
Good old Judd thought up the scheme
Am
Good old Judd is Shirley's dream
Dm
But old Judd don't want
G
to share her chicken coop
Verse 10
G
And the nurse would like to keep Shirley's
Em
Bm
body six feet deep in her grave
D
Dm
And chase him to the Baltic Sea
C
For she sees herself his wife to poor Bob
Am
Dm
Who's found a life as a farmer
G
since he lost his memory
Verse 11
G
So to give a resume
Em
Bobby's bailing up the hay
Bm
D
While his wife is in the straw
Dm
F
with Bill and Fred
C
But she don't feel great inside
Am
Dm
It's that dose of cyanide that the nurse and
G
Judd will feed her til she's dead
Verse 12
G
There's a baby who just grew
Em
fifteen years in only two
G
Bm
D
And she has her eyes on
Dm
Judd who is her dad
F
C
But of course she can't know that
She just knows just where it's at
As her mother says,
"It's good to be so glad"
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