Mrs. von tussle says chords by
Pattie Darcy

N/A

Simplified

Key: Bb major

Verse 1

I've taught you all the lessons they

don't teach in public schools

And so let's all recite Velma Von

Tussle's golden rules

Verse 2
Am Am 
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D D 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Am Am 
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Girls, you mustn't ever
D D 
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eat snacks
G G 
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D D 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Colors, ladies,
G G 
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stay away from blacks
Am Am 
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D D 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Am Am 
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Girls, let's hope not one more stomach
D D 
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G G 
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growls
(Remember)
Bb Bb 
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G G 
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What Mrs. Von Tussle says is gold

Verse 3
Am Am 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
D D 
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The girl who's chosen must
Am Am 
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D D 
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be  the right fit
G G 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
D D 
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Stand still, Amber,
G G 
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let me have that zit
Am Am 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
D D 
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Am Am 
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We must read out those Baltimore
D D 
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G G 
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hips
(Remember)
C C 
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G G 
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Am Am 
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What Mrs. Von Tussle says sticks
G G 
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A

Verse 4
C C 
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lady's virtue in my days
just wasn't up for grabs
Bm Bm 2
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And now you got my
underlocking key
C C 
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Remember, girls, that I was crowned
to Miss Baltimore Crabs!
D D 
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C# C# 4
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(Yeah, way back in one million
D D 
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years BC!)
(Cha cha cha!)

Verse 5
Am Am 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
D D 
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Am Am 
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Brenda clearly went too
D D 
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far one night
G G 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
D D 
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Girls, lesson learned
G G 
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We'll keep our ... tight!
Am Am 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
D D 
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And now it's time to...
Am Am 
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D D 
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G G 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Bb Bb 
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Get out your claws and let
Ab Ab 4
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the games begin

Verse 6
Bbm Bbm 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Eb Eb 6
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Bbm Bbm 
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Eb Eb 6
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Just how many sweat ers do you own?
Three? (Aw!)
Ab Ab 4
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Eb Eb 6
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Ab Ab 4
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What color is your private
princess from?
Aqua? (Aw!)
Bbm Bbm 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Eb Eb 6
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Bbm Bbm 
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Come back when daddy buys  you
Eb Eb 6
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Ab Ab 4
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a new nose
(Remember)
Cm Cm 3
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What Mrs. Von Tussle
Ab Ab 4
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says 's gold.

Verse 7
Bbm Bbm 
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Eb Eb 6
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Bbm Bbm 
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Eb Eb 6
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Listen people, can I be frank?
Ab Ab 4
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Eb Eb 6
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Ab Ab 4
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You're twist was crap and kid,
your pony stanks!
Bbm Bbm 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Eb Eb 6
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What's that move,
Bbm Bbm 
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Eb Eb 6
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Ab Ab 4
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a scratch for fleas and ticks?
(Remember)
What Mrs. Von Tussle says sticks

Verse 8
Db Db 4
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Too short, too tall, too big, too small
My God, what's on your face?
Cm Cm 3
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You're not what
Velma's public wants to see
Db Db 4
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But I can dream this world would
seem a much more lovely place
Eb Eb 6
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D D 
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If everybody here in looked
Eb Eb 6
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like me!
E E 
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(Cha cha cha!)

Verse 9

(Mrs. Von Tussle says)

And finally, I hate to sound cruel

(Mrs. Von Tussle says)

Verse 10

Would you swim in an integrated pool?

I sure would, I'm all for integration,

it's the new frontier

Not in Baltimore, it isn't

Verse 11
Bm Bm 2
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E E 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Darling, well,
Bm Bm 2
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E E 
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this just is not your day
A A 
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(Mrs. Von Tussle says)
Guys, Amber, take her away!

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