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Fertility Clinic, The chords by Jeff Foxworthy

  • Ab

    4
  • F#

    2
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Verse 1
(A flat major) I guess my kids will make fun of me. I'm about ready to be a
parent here. I've just turned 30 and I'm tired of cutting the grass.
But my wife and
I, we're trying to have a kid now. I
guess we've been trying about six months.
She's not pregnant yet, but I figure if
you've got to be a failure at something, boo!
It's about as much fun as anything.
But my wife's real concerned
nothing's happened yet.
In fact, she made us an appointment
at one of these fertility clinics.
And in talking to these people, they said,
well, it's easier to (F sharp major) check men than it is (A flat major) wo men,
so send your husband down first.
And I'm real excited about this.
I mean, cause I knew what they wanted,
I just didn't know
how they planned on getting it.
I didn't know if the doctor took matters
in his own hands
or if it was like a dairy or what.
I know.
Well, I told you a friend of mine,
he had been through it with his wife and he said,
Jeff, just relax.
It's a do it yourself place.
He said,
you go down there, they give you a little cup
and a
Playboy magazine.
He said, you take
them off in a little room
and just crank her up.
Well, now I'm excited.
I'm thinking,
well, hell, I hope it's an issue I don't have.
Because that would be embarrassing.
Do you have another month?
This isn't doing anything for me
here.
Something with twins
if you got it.
So I'm nervous,
but I did go to the place
about three weekends ago.
I'm down there. I'm waiting out in
the lobby.
The nurse calls me in and
she just hands me a cup
No magazine just a cup. I
Took the cup from her. went off in the little
room
They gave me and you know did what
I was supposed to do
Then I waited a few minutes because I didn't
want to look like a circus freak, you know
So I got my cup I'm walking back down the hall
I found the nurse
I handed her the thing and she said,
we don't do that here,
we just need a urine sample.
I have never been that embarrassed
in my entire life.
And my wife told everybody too.
My own mother's going,
heard what you did in the cop.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
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