Key: B major•
Verse 1
E
B
My feet are too long
My hair's falling out
C#
F#
and my rights are all wrong
E
B
that I've no friends at all
Won't you write me a letter,
F#
B
won't you give me a call?
E
F#
B
B
Signed bewildered
Chorus 1
E
B
You have no complaint
You are what you are
C#
F#
and you ain't what you ain't
B
E
B
So listen up, buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck
F#
B
and knocking on wood
E
F#
B
B
Verse 2
E
B
My fountain pen leaks
My wife hollers at me
C#
F#
and my kids are all freaks
E
B
is the wrong side of bed
F#
B
If weren't so expensive I'd wish I were dead
E
F#
B
B
Signed unhappy
Chorus 2
E
B
You have no complaint
You are what you are
C#
F#
and you ain't what you ain't
B
E
B
So listen up, buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck
F#
B
and knocking on wood
E
F#
B
B
Dear Abby, dear Abby
Dear Abby, dear Abby
Verse 3
E
B
You won't believe this
But my stomach makes noises
C#
F#
whenever I kiss
B
E
B
My girlfriend tells me it's all in my head
F#
B
But my stomach tells me to write you instead
E
F#
B
B
Signed noisemaker
Chorus 3
E
B
You have no complaint
You are what you are
C#
F#
and you ain't what you ain't
B
E
B
So listen up, buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck
F#
B
and knocking on wood
E
F#
B
B
Verse 4
E
B
Well I never thought
That me and my girlfriend
C#
F#
would ever get caught
E
B
just shooting the breeze
With her hair up in curlers
F#
B
and her pants to her knees
E
F#
B
B
Signed just married
Chorus 4
E
B
You have no complaint
You are what you are
C#
F#
and you ain't what you ain't
B
E
B
So listen up, buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck
F#
B
and knocking on wood
E
F#
B
Signed dear Abby
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TunerE A D G B E
ChordsB E C# F#
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