Everything You Know Is Wrong chords by
Steve Goodie
Steve Goodie

N/A
Key: D major
Verse 1
D
D

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C
C

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Bm
Bm

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A
A

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I was
D
D

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G
G

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driving on the freeway
A
A

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D
D

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in the fast lane
G
G

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A
A

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With a rabid wolverine in
Bm
Bm

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my underwear
E
E

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A
A

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When suddenly a guy behind me
in the backseat
G
G

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Popped right up and cupped
D
D

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his hands across my eyes
I guessed,
G
G

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A
A

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D
D

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is it Uncle Frank or Cousin Louie?
G
G

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A
A

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Is it Bob or Joe or Walter?
Bm
Bm

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A
A

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E
E

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Could it be Bill or Jim or Ed or Bernie or Al?
A
A

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I probably would have kept on guessing
But about that time we
Bm
Bm

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crashed into the truck
E
E

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And as I'm laying bleeding
A
A

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bare on the asphalt,
D
D

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G
G

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Em
Em

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finally I recognize the face
G
G

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of my hibachi dealer,
A
A

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G
G

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F#m
F#m

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who takes off his prosthetic lips
E
E

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D
D

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and tells me,
G
G

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A
A

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D
D

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Everything you know is wrong.
G
G

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Black is white, up is down,
A
A

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Bm
Bm

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and short is long.
A
A

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E
E

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And everything you thought
A
A

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G
G

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was just so important
F#m
F#m

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Em
Em

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E
E

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A
A

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does n't matter.
D
D

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G
G

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A
A

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D
D

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Everything you know is wrong.
A
A

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F#m
F#m

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Bm
Bm

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Just forget the words and sing along.
E
E

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All you need to understand
G
G

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A
A

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F
F

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G
G

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is that everything you know is wrong
D
D

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G
G

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I was walking to the kitchen
A
A

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D
D

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for some golden grams
G
G

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A
A

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When I accidentally stepped
Bm
Bm

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A
A

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into an alternate dimension
E
E

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A
A

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And soon I was abducted
G
G

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by some aliens from space
A
A

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D
D

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who kinda looked like Jamie Farr
G
G

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A
A

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They sucked out my internal organs
D
D

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and they took some Polaroids and
G
G

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A
A

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said I was a darn good sport
Bm
Bm

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A
A

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E
E

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And as a way of saying thank you,
A
A

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they offered to transport me back
to any point in history
Bm
Bm

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that I would care to go
E
E

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And so I had them send me back
A
A

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to last Thursday night
F#m
F#m

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G
G

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So I could pay my phone bill on time
Em
Em

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G
G

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Just then the floating, disembodied head
A
A

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G
G

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of Colonel Sanders
F#m
F#m

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E
E

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A
A

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D
D

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Started yelling
G
G

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A
A

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Everything you know is wrong
D
D

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G
G

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Black is white, up is down,
A
A

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Bm
Bm

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and short is long
A
A

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E
E

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And everything you thought
A
A

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G
G

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was just so important
F#m
F#m

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A
A

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D
D

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Does n't matter
G
G

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A
A

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Everything you know is wrong
D
D

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A
A

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Just forget the word
F#m
F#m

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Bm
Bm

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s and sing along
E
E

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All you need to understand
G
G

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A
A

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D
D

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G
G

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E
E

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F#m
F#m

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E
E

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F#
F#

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Bbm
Bbm

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F#
F#

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is everything you know is wrong
G
G

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A
A

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C
C

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Cm
Cm

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F
F

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G
G

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Am
Am

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Bb
Bb

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Gm
Gm

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A
A

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Am
Am

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C
C

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Bb
Bb

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G
G

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C
C

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Dm
Dm

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Eb
Eb

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Fm
Fm

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F#
F#

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A
A

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Am
Am

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Bb
Bb

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G
G

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C
C

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A
A

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D
D

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G
G

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I was just about to mail a letter
A
A

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D
D

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to my evil twin
A
A

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Bm
Bm

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When I got a nasty paper cut
E
E

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And well, to make a long story short
A
A

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It got infected and I died
D
D

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G
G

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So now I'm up in heaven with Saint Peter
A
A

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D
D

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By the pearly gates
G
G

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A
A

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And it's obvious he doesn't
Bb
Bb

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Bm
Bm

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A
A

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like the Nehru jacket
E
E

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That I'm wearing
A
A

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He tells me that they've
got a dress code
Bm
Bm

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E
E

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Well, he lets me into heaven anyway
A
A

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F#m
F#m

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But I get the room next
G
G

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to the noisy ice machine
Em
Em

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G
G

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For all eternity
Bm
Bm

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A
A

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G
G

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F#m
F#m

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And every day you run
E
E

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A
A

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D
D

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by screaming
G
G

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A
A

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Everything you know is wrong
D
D

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Black is white, up is down,
G
G

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A
A

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Bm
Bm

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and short is long
A
A

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E
E

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And everything you used to think
was so important
A
A

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G
G

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Doesn't really matter anymore
F#m
F#m

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E
E

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Because the simple fact
remains that
D
D

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G
G

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A
A

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Everything you know is wrong
D
D

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G
G

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Bm
Bm

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Just forget the words and sing along
E
E

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All you need to understand is
G
G

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A
A

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Everything you know is
G
G

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A
A

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Everything you know is
D
D

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A
A

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Everything you know is wrong
D
D

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