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Dave & Al chords by
Frank Zappa
Frank Zappa
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N/A•
Key: G minor•
Verse 1
Em
Em

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Alright, hey, hey listen

Before we go on to the next song

I got a really important piece of business

I've gotta take care of

Now, there's this guy
B
B
2

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Em
Em

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That uh, works for us, he sells the T- shirts
B
B
2

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Em
Em

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His name is David Dikowitz
Verse 2
Em
Em

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B
B
2

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Now, some of you might know David
Em
Em

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And if you know him
B
B
2

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You realize that David is
Em
Em

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a lonely guy
A
A

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Em
Em

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He hasn't been pooched in three days
B
B
2

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Em
Em

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His nectar has built up, so to speak

And he asked me

If I could help him get a girl tonight
Verse 3
Em
Em

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Now, normally I don't do this because
B
B
2

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I mean, of course being
Em
Em

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a pimp is my hobby
D
D

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Em
Em

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But in Dikowitz's case

This is taking it above and

beyond the call of duty

As they say in the trade
Verse 4
Em
Em

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Bm
Bm
2

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So here, here's the plan
Em
Em

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Somewhere out there, I know

Somewhere in this building there is a girl

Or a female type object
A
A

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Em
Em

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Who desires the companionship of a nice,

Jewish boy
Bm
Bm
2

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Em
Em

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Who sells T- shirts

Now, I'm gonna make you

a two for one offer

Here's the deal
Verse 5
Em
Em

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If you're a girl and you wanna
Bm
Bm
2

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And you wanna submit to
B
B
2

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Em
Em

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Dikowitz's advances

If you'll go for Dikowitz

And you got a friend or sister

That would like to spend some

time with Al Malcon
Verse 6
Em
Em

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Who's an a, who's another
B
B
2

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Em
Em

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Bm
Bm
2

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Dangerously lonely guy
B
B
2

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Em
Em

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Had a little problem here the other night

I understand, I don't like to be
Bm
Bm
2

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spreading gossip around
Em
Em

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But this is New York
Verse 7
Em
Em

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B
B
2

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Bm
Bm
2

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Al is a very lonely person
Em
Em

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And he came here to the

show the other night

With his girlfriend
C
C

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G
G

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D
D

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He introduced me to her in the back
Em
Em

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She was a very
Verse 8
B
B
2

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nice person
D
D

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They went and they sat in the
Em
Em

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audience to see the show
D
D

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She says, excuse me for a minute
Em
Em

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I'm go get, gonna go get a drink
D
D

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Em
Em

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She disappeared, didn't come back
D
D

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Until five o'clock in the morning
Em
Em

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Told she was drunk said:
Verse 9
Em
Em

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"Al, I hate you"
Bm
Bm
2

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Em
Em

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In an exorcist voice

And told him to move out

Now, we got these two
D
D

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Em
Em

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Very nice people who need it
G
G

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Em
Em

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Now, as a matter of fact
Verse 10

Can we get a spotlight down here?
D
D

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Em
Em

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Just so you see what

the merchandise is like
B
B
2

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Em
Em

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A
A

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This is David Dikowitz, right here
Em
Em

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D
D

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Em
Em

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Now, obviously, he is nice

He is Jewish and he is a boy, right?
A
A

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Em
Em

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So,
Verse 11

you see what you're in for

If you want, if you wanna
Bm
Bm
2

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do it with David
Em
Em

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Just come down and introduce yourself
G
G

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There, alright, see?
Em
Em

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What did I tell you?
Verse 12
Em
Em

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Congratulations,
Bm
Bm
2

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Em
Em

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what's your name?
Bm
Bm
2

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Karen
Em
Em

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Karen?
Bm
Bm
2

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Em
Em

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I now pronounce you, David an d Karen
B
B
2

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Off that way
G#
G#
4

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B
B
2

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Em
Em

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D
D

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A
A

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Em
Em

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Verse 13
A
A

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Em
Em

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G
G

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Em
Em

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Alright

Now, that's what I like about New York
G
G

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You get results
D
D

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Em
Em

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Ah, now where's Malcon?
Bm
Bm
2

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Em
Em

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If we can do the same thing

for Malcon

We'll really be doing it
Verse 14

Where is he?
Em
Em

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Maybe we'll find him later

Okay but where?
Interlude 1

Al, come here
Em
Em

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B
B
2

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Em
Em

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Bm
Bm
2

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Em
Em

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Verse 15
Em
Em

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Ladies and gentlemen

This is my friend, Al Malcon

He's also a very nice person

Would you like to give a

sales pitch yourself?
Verse 16
Em
Em

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Well, I'll tell ya

I don't know if there's

anybody really cute
D
D

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Em
Em

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You know, and I stay away from

You know, young girls
G
G

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Anybody about 18 or close, you know
Bm
Bm
2

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Blonde hair
Em
Em

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F#m
F#m
2

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D
D

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Verse 17

A
A

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Em
Em

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He wants a virgin with nice breath
Bm
Bm
2

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Em
Em

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Yeah, vir gin would be
G
G

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nice but
Em
Em

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Right there, you (almost there)

A volunteer right there
G
G

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Where?
Em
Em

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No, no, oh, she's go ing

No, no, don't touch me

No, get away, no
Verse 18
Em
Em

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Well, listen
G
G

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What?
Em
Em

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Right here

What's your name?

Lisa
Em
Em

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Lisa, this is Al
Interlude 2
Em
Em

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Bm
Bm
2

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Em
Em

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Verse 19
Em
Em

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It's happening to me

(It's happening)

It's happening to you

She has no idea what's going to

be happening to her
B
B
2

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Well, who does anymore
Em
Em

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It's the 20th century
Verse 20
Em
Em

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Wait here This
Bm
Bm
2

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girl loves you
Em
Em

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Chris, tell him to come over here

Tell him to come over here?

C'mere
Verse 21
Em
Em

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What's your name? Chris


Well, let the audience see you,

c'mon
Verse 22

Oh my god
Em
Em

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B
B
2

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Now, isn't this better than com
Em
Em

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Bm
Bm
2

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puter dating?
Em
Em

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Em
Em

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Why don't you guys go over there

and get acquainted?

Okay, on with the show

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An acoustic guitar head with tuning pegs

Open Tuner
Chords

  • Em

  • B

    2

  • A

  • D

  • Bm

    2

  • C

  • G

  • G#

    4

  • F#m

    2

Capo: 3

Transpose: 0

0

Autoscroll20%

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Frequently asked questions

What is the original key of Dave & Al?

The original key of Dave & Al by Frank Zappa is G minor.

What are the main chords for Dave & Al?

The primary chords used in Dave & Al are Gm, D, C, F, Dm, Eb.

Do I need a capo to play Dave & Al?

To play in the original key, place your capo on the 3 fret.

Is Dave & Al beginner-friendly on guitar?

Yes, this version uses open chords like Gm, D, C, F, making it a great song for beginner guitarists.

What is the tempo (BPM) of Dave & Al?

The tempo of Dave & Al is approximately 154 beats per minute.

How do I transpose the chords for Dave & Al?

You can easily change the key of Dave & Al using our Transpose button located in the toolbar. This will automatically update all chord diagrams on the page to match your new key.

Can I print the guitar chords for Dave & Al?

Yes! Click the Print icon to generate a clean, one-page version of the chords and lyrics for Dave & Al. This is perfect for practicing offline or adding to a physical songbook.

Is there a tuner available for Dave & Al?

Yes, we have integrated a Mini-Tuner directly on this page. Use it to quickly check your string pitch (Standard Tuning: E A D G B E) before you start playing along with Frank Zappa.

Can I save Dave & Al to play later?

Absolutely. Click the Save or Heart icon to add Dave & Al to your account. You can access all your saved songs under My Library at any time.

Can I access the guitar chords for Dave & Al for free?

You can view the full chord sheet and lyrics for Dave & Al by Frank Zappa on this page for free. We provide high-quality, verified chords to help you start playing immediately.