The Ski Instructor chords by
Ray Conrad

N/A

Key: D major

Verse 1
D D 
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A A 
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I am a ski instructor.
D D 
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I really ski quite well.
G G 
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I'm tall and tan and handsome,
A A 
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D D 
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and my skis are parallel.
Bm Bm 2
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A A 
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My poles are always held just so,
D D 
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as down the hill I slide.
G G 
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And the ladies all admire me,
A A 
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because I'm certified.
D D 
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A A 
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My skis are waxed correctly
D D 
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for every type of snow
G G 
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And I speak with an Austrian accent,
A A 
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D D 
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though I come from Idaho.
A A 
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Young ladies watch me closely
D D 
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and cast me glances warm.
G G 
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They fondly sigh as I cristy -by
A A 
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D D 
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and remark about my form
Bm Bm 2
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A A 
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I demonstrate to  mambo the
D D 
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snowplow or the stem
G G 
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And if the girls get covered with snow,
A A 
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D D 
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I'll brush it off for them
Bm Bm 2
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A A 
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I aid each maid religiously
in whatever she tries to do
D D 
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And if she's real cute
G G 
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I might tighten her boot
A A 
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D D 
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A A 
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D D 
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G G 
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A A 
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D D 
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and clean her gozzles too
Bm Bm 2
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A A 
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I'm reaching the base of  the mountain
D D 
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With my student, sweet and fair
G G 
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With a gesture fine I cut the line
A A 
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D D 
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And escort her to a chair
Bm Bm 2
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A A 
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And as we ascend the mountain
D D 
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I murmur in her ear
G G 
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And give her the word on the things which
A A 
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D D 
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I've heard are needed to make a skier
Bm Bm 2
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A A 
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So if you would be an  instructor,
D D 
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pay heed to the secrets I've told
G G 
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If the gal is fair, be devil -ne 'er,
A A 
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D D 
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be masterful and bold
Bm Bm 2
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A A 
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Impress her with your ability,
D D 
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but don't let her ever say no.
G G 
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Remind her that skiing with no sex involved
A A 
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D D 
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is nothing but cold, cold snow.
Dm Dm 
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D D 
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Bm Bm 2
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A A 
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Now that is the end of  my essay
D D 
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on the ski instruction bit.
Just follow my lead
G G 
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and it's guaranteed you'll
A A 
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D D 
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be an instant hit
You may ask,
Bm Bm 2
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A A 
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well what about menfolks?
D D 
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Don't you instruct them too?
And I say, ignore them,
G G 
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it's good enough for them
D D 
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A A 
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D D 
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They're just after them womenfolks too you

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ChordsD A G Bm Dm

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