Best Tuning App Ever
MaddProfessor"
I’ve downloaded many tuning apps before and this one is by far the best. Easy to use, super user-friendly, and they have a bunch of fun different chords and songs to help you learn new music. I highly recommend.
(Part Three) Growth And Learning easy guitar chords by Monty Python
N/A•
Guitar
Tuning
E A D G B E
Capo
Fret 1
Capo
Transpose
0
Capo
D
F#m
G
D
F#m
G
Verse 1
Now,
before I begin the
lesson, will those
of you who
are playing in the
match this afternoon
move your clothes
down onto
the lower peg immediately
after
lunch.
Before
you write
your
letter home,
if you're not
getting your hair
cut, unless you've got a
younger brother
who's
going out this weekend
as the guest
of another boy,
in which case collect
his
note before
lunch,
put it in
your letter after
you've had your haircut,
and make
sure
he moves your
clothes down onto the
lower peg for
you. now.
sir. yes
Weimer. my
younger brother's
go
ing out with
Dibble this weekend
sir but I'm not
having my
haircut today
sir
so do I
move my
clothes I do wish
you'd listen
Weimer. it's
perfectly
simple.
if
you're not
getting
your haircut
you don't have to
move your
brother's clothes
down to the lower peg.
you simply collect
his
note before lunch
After
you've done your scripture
prep, when
you've written
your letter home before
rest,
move your own
clothes onto the
lower peg,
greet the visitors,
and report to
Mr.
Viney that
you've had your chit
signed.
Now,
sex.
Sex,
sex.
Where were we?
Well, had I
got as far as
the penis
entering
the vagina?
No,
No,
sir.
No,
sir.
Well, had I done
foreplay?
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
ah
well as
we all know
all about foreplay
no
doubt you can tell
me what
the purpose of
a foreplay
is.
pigs.
no
sorry sir.
Carter! ah
was
it
taking your clothes off sir?
and
after that?
putting them on a lower
peg sir.
purpose of
foreplay is
to cause the vagina
to
lubricate
so that the
penis can penetrate
more easily.
can we have a
window up
please sir.
yes
Harris will do.
and of course to cause the
band's penis
to erect
and
ha!
then
now
did
I do
vaginal
juices last
week? oh
do pay
attention
Wadsworth!
I know it's
Friday
after... oh watching
the football
are you
boy? right move
over there.
I'm warning you
I may
decide to set
an exam this
term.
Oh,
sir.
So
just
listen.
Now, did I
or
did I
not do
vaginal
juices?
Yes, sir.
Name
two ways
of getting
them flowing,
Watson.
Rubbing
the clitoris,
What's
wrong with a kiss
boy?
Why not start
her off with a nice
kiss?
You
don't have to go leaping
straight for the
clitoris like a bull
at a gate.
Give her a
kiss, boy.
Suck the
nipples,
Good,
good, well done,
line them up.
Striking
the thighs, sir.
Yes,
yes, I suppose so.
Marching the
neck.
Yes,
good, nibbling
the el
bow,
kneading the
buttocks and so on
and so forth.
So, we have
all these
possibilities before
we
stampede
towards
the clitoris,
Watson.
Yes, sir.
Sorry, sir.
Now,
all these forms
of stimulation
can
now take
place.
And
of course, tonguing
will give you the best
idea of
how the juices
are coming
along.
Now,
penetration
and coitus,
that is to
say, intercourse
up to
and including
orgasm.
Ah, hello,
dear.
Do
stand
up.
My wife
enters the room,
Carter.
Oh,
sorry, sir.
Sorry.
Wyver,
this is for your
be
nefit.
Will you
kindly wake
up?
I've no
intention of going
through this all again.
We'll
take the foreplay
as
read, if
you don't mind.
No,
of course not,
Hamlet.
So,
the man starts
by entering
or
mounting
his good lady
wife in
the standard
way.
The penis
is now,
as
you will observe,
more
or less fully
erect.
There
we are.
Ah,
that's better.
Now,
Carter.
Yes,
sir?
What is it?
It's an ocarina,
sir.
Bring it up here.
The
man
now starts
making
thrusting movements
with his
pel
vic area,
mov
ing the
penis up
and
down inside
the vagina.
So put
it there, boy.
Put it there on the
table.
while
the wife
maximises
her clitoral
stimulation
by the
shaft of the penis
by pushing
forward.
Thank you,
dear.
Now,
as the sexual
excitement mounts...
What's
funny,
Biggs?
Oh, nothing,
sir.
Oh, do please
share your
little joke with the
rest of us.
I mean, obviously
something frightfully
funny
is going on.
No, honestly,
sir.
Well, as it's so
funny,
I think
you'd better be selected
to play
for the boys' team
in the
rugby match against
the
Masters.
Oh, no, sir.
Oh
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