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The Waiter And The Porter And The Upstairs Maid chords by Mary Martin

  • G

  • Em

  • C

  • D

  • A

  • B

    2
  • Eb

    6
  • Am

  • E

Verse 1
G
Em
C
D
A
D
C
As your genial host,
may I offer a toast
G
C
To the wine -buying guest on my right
A
D
Hooray for the wine -buyer!
C
Yes, drag out the cookin' sherry
D
for the old colonel
G
May his bank account
C
grow heavy -laden with dough
D
A
D
May he spend it in here every night
Every night
G
B
Em
Seeing this night in its glory,
B
Em
you people so loyal, so true,
Eb
D
puts me in mind of a story.
Em
A
D
Tell us about it, pray do.
G
The people in the ballroom
Am
Em
C
were stuffy and arty,
Am
G
Em
so I began to get just a little bit afraid.
D
G
Am
I sneaked into the kitchen.
Em
G
I dug me a party
C
G
Em
the waiter and the porter
C
and the second story made
D
G
I peeked into the parlor
Am
G
C
G
to see what was a hatching in time
Em
A
to hear the hostess suggest a charade
D
G
Am
But who was in the pantry
C
a laughing and scratching?
D
G
Em
D
wait and the border and the upstairs
G
D
G
When they heard the music
D
that the orchestra played
C
the waiter and the porter
grabbed a hold of the maid
Em
Then they all proceeded to go into a clog
E
Em
D
A diggity -dog
Em
G
C
If ever I'm invited to
Em
G
some fuddy -duddy's
D
G
Em
I ain't a -gonna watch
D
any harlequin -ade
G
C
You'll find him in the kitchen
G
applauding his buddies
C
G
Em
The waiter and the porter
D
and the upstairs man
G
Eb
C
Well, pardon me, folks,
Em
the roast is carved
C
The wine is served while
G
you look half -starved
C
G
Pardon me, sir, may we be free
Em
Am
A
D
The kitchen guard is having a jambor
G
C
Eb
G
C
ee
Eb
D
G
C
I went and got a dishpan
to use as a thimble
G
Em
The porter found a regular
C
D
glass that he played
G
C
The fingers of the waiter
were each in a thimble
G
He should have heard the music
Em
D
Em
that the combination made
C
Em
C
B
Em
C
Em
B
Em
G
Marching through the kitchen
to the pantry and back
C
Why, man, you should have seen us,
we were ballin' with Jack
Once a half an hour passed
Em
without any call
E
D
Jack, we had a ball
C
G
C
The waltzes and mazurkas,
D
we hate them, we spurn them,
G
Em
we got a lot of rhythms,
C
A
D
we want to hear play, yes,
G
C
and we know who to go to
G
when we want to learn them,
the waiter and the porter
Em
D
and the upstairs man.
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