The Human News Reel chords by Bruz Fletcher

SimplifiedB · D · Bm · F# · A …

GuitarPianoUkulele

B
D
Bm
F#
A
C#
G
Bb
C
Em
Asus4

Verse 1
B 
D 
A story of the interesting little people
whom we meet
in the newsreel theaters of the world.
B 
D 
B 
Bm 
I  meet the furious, curious,
F# 
penurious people of
the day.
D 
And  in their funny way, ha ha,
B 
I find them very gay.
D 
I learn the history, mystery,
F# 
blistery tales of love and hate.
B 
D 
Of the very small and the very great.
Wait. Flood time in the South.
A 
D 
Once again the mighty Mississippi
overflows her banks
and runs through the once
arid city
A 
of Flutesville, Alabama.
D 
We hear of the disaster
through one of the survivors,
Miss Lucy Debussy, Miss Debussy.
I was giving a music lesson
in the home of a Mrs. Wesson.
C# 
D 
When the flood began, the family ran,
B 
D 
but I was true to my show path.
F# 
D 
The people left and took two boats
while I was playing my silvery notes,
G 
A 
and then the piano floated away
D 
and I was left without no pay.
I held my music in my mouth
and swam upstream away from that cell.
B 
I met my folks in Cincinnati,
A 
D 
but they turned their backs
because I look so raffy.
Bb 
D 
That's my family for you.
A famous Hollywood masseuse
gives business hints.
A 
This brave, tailored little woman reveals all.
D 
I  started in a salad shop
and beat my way right to the top,
but I found more
money in Miss Garbo's legs
G 
than I did in whipping up four
Bm 
dozen of eggs
D 
they stood up for me in that
A 
western town.
D 
Because of act so hard
they could not sit down
if you want to make money
Bm 
G 
my advice to you
Is to save your paddle
D 
and sell your canoe
After working for 40 years
Mrs. Daisy Wiggle has finally completed
A 
a dollhouse
made completely from human hair
Bm 
D 
this tiny elfin little dwelling
Contains one hair
from every nation
and notable in the world mrs.
Wiggle
Pulling hairs is lots of fun.
You really ought to try it
From kings and queens and everyone
C 
D 
G 
I've snitched hairs on the quiet.
D 
F# 
G 
They never miss a strand or so,
D 
don't even know they're gone,
and if they turn around
you know I'm merely scamper on.
I've lovely hairs from horses' tails
from apes and mamas' asses.
I've elephant hairs as tough as nails
and lots of grand aggress.
Of course I never did believe
that this work would make me rich, you silly,
but I'll take it apart someday
and weave myself a beautiful swit.
Bb 
The citizens of Oomlat, Arizona,
D 
were amazed today to find Mrs. Gaspo,
A 
D 
a resident fortunately not from the town proper,
walking in the streets completely
nude.
Mrs. Gaspo
claimed that she'd been attacked
by a swarm of locusts
and refused to be ashamed of her lack of clothing,
A 
D 
Mrs. Gaspo.
I was riding leisure -like to town
when a swarm of locusts
settled down on me and Mary,
that's my horse,
and the bitten chard with
all their force.
They et poor Maeve clean away,
A 
et my clothes and my hair turn gray.
D 
Now here I am like I was born
and them rascals yelling
September morn.
It ain't September them sassy little brats
G 
ought to give me their coats
Em 
and tip up their hats.
D 
I'm a church going woman
and I ain't worried.
G 
D 
Gonna buy a new horse
and I won't be hurried.
May get address if my money holds out.
Boys, look at me and learn what it's
G 
about.
Bm 
D 
Asus4 
A 
D 