Etiquette Blues chords by Les Brown
Intro 1
C
F
D
A
D
G
C
Verse 1
C
Now I'm the guy
G
that wrote the book on etiquette.
I know just how all your vittles
C
should be ended.
F
I have written this book
F#dim
about mistakes,
A
what I have saw.
G
A
D
Take them down and don't forget
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to what I say is law.
C
Always leave the spoon up in the coffee.
Start with the soup
A
before you sound your A.
G
Napkins are to catch the food
A
that bounces off the knife.
D
G
Tuck the napkin in so it will stay.
C
G
C
Always put both elbows on the table.
G
C
F
Many other pointers I could mention.
G
Always gesture with your fork.
A
Friday means it's fish or pork.
Dm
G
Thank you for your very
C
kind attention.
When the tea is hot,
just use the saucer.
A
Pick a pumpkin pie up in your hand,
G
never ask for nothin'
A
that you can safely reach.
D
G
Read Rule 82, you'll understand.
C
Wipe your plate with bread
when you have finished.
G
C
F
Many other pointers I could mention.
G
Grab your glass of Whip on drop,
A
always finish when you stop.
Dm
G
Thank you for your very
C
kind attention.
Always mix the peas with the potatoes.
A
This makes eating with a knife a cinch.
G
When someone asks for bread,
A
grab several in your mouth.
D
G
Dill them out like you was dillin' a flinch.
C
Take two toothpicks,
you might sometimes drop one.
G
C
F
Many other pointers I could mention.
G
Put your gum beneath your plate,
A
eat so fast you won't be late.
Dm
G
Thank you for your very
C
kind attention.
Never cut spaghetti up in pieces.
A
Eat it like a chicken eating worms.
G
When you're eating cake,
C
A
be sure to eat the force of force.
D
G
Watch out for bacteria and germs.
C
When you're eating grapefruit,
wear your goggles, wear your goggles.
G
C
F
Many other pointers I could mention.
A
Finger balls are so close by,
A
in the bench a glass runs dry.
Dm
G
Thank you for your very kind affair.
Outro 1
Thank yous v -v -very much.
C
Etiquette Blues
Les Brown
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