The Lone Psychiatrist chords by Stan Freberg

SimplifiedC · F · F# · Fm · B

GuitarPianoUkulele

Intro 1

Verse 1
C 
Out of the Mayo Clinic into
the West with the speed
F 
of light
and a cloud of dust
F# 
the lone psychiatrist rides again.

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Verse 2
F# 
Near the little town of Nervous, New Mexico
F 
a masked man and an Indian press
forward into the gathering twilight.
Hurry, pronto.
Press forward into the gathering
twilight.
Mmm, get more slobby.
Gotta get to the Wonderland
Ranch before midnight,
if I'm going to straighten out
Grandpa Snyder.
What you gonna do?
A little psychoanalysis in Wonderland.
Ugh, lousy pun.
Watch yourself, Proto.
It's not too late to get Jeff Chandler.
C 
Mmm, look, Stranger up ahead.
F 
Yeah, it's good, I'll ask directions.
Whoa, big fellow!
Howdy, Stranger.
Howdy, Dave.
How come that you're wearing a mask,
going to a party?
No, the reason I...
Oh, sorry, dearly, love parties.
No, the reason I wear it is
so no one will know me.
At the party, you mean?
C 
No, there is no party.
F 
Can you direct me to Grand
C 
pa Snyder's?
F 
Grandpa Snyder's?
That's the party.
I thought you said
there weren't no party.
There isn't, Grandpa Snyder,
C 
which way?
F 
Well, it's about two hoots and a
holler down.
How come that Indian's
riding on a cow?
Well, where could you get a cab
F# 
this time of night?
Oh, big fellow!
F 
Greetings,
I am the lone psychiatrist.
Are we headed right for
C 
Grandpa  Snyder's?
F 
Yep, dead ahead.
Can't miss it.
On to the party, eh?
C 
F 
No, there is no par -
C 
F 
Brrrk, bup, bup, bup, bup, brrrk, brrrrk.
Say, how come that big
white horse of yours
cackles instead of whinnying?
He has a complex,
he thinks he's a chicken.
Well you are the lone psychiatrist,
why don't you straighten him out?
Fm 
F 
I would, but I need the eggs.
Look grandpa, you're under
comes a masked man riding a horse,
and a cow riding an Indian.
Wonder why it's riding an Indian.
Well, where could you get a cab
this time of night?
Howdy, folks.
You must be Mrs. Snyder.
Speaking.
And this is Grandpa.
C 
He's the one I've come to see.
F 
What for?
To straighten me out? Partly.
I thought you said there weren't
no partly.
There weren't. I mean, uh, boy.
Say, how come your mask
has got a little bitty glass
wonder in it?
Because on my lunch hour,
I go skin diving.
I'll accept that.
Mr. Psychiatrist, about Grandpa,
he thinks he's a Great Dane,
and I can't tell him no different. I see.
How long have you been obsessed with this idea?
Ever since I was a pup.
Hmm.
Well, just lie down here on the couch.
Oh, she don't like me to get up on the
couch.
I'm supposed to stay in my basket.
That's nonsense.
You're no more a dog than I am.
Here, have a bone.
Uh, thanks.
I'll bury it later.
Now repeat after me.
I am not a Great Dane.
I'm not a Great Dane.
I am Grandpa Snyder.
I am Grandpa Snyder.
Hey, Ma, I'm well, I'm well!
I don't like porn!
Away!
Oh, he's gone,
and I wanted to thank him.
Who was that masked man,
anyhow?
Beats me, but I'm well.
You are?
C 
F 
Sure, feel my nose.
You
B 