Taking My Ball chords by Joell Ortiz
Intro 1
Em
B
Verse 1
Em
It feels so wrong
cause it feels so right
A
Em
But it's alright, it's okay with me
I'll do my stints all by myself,
A
B
I don't need nobody to play with me
Em
But if you just give me a chance,
G
I can put you in a trance the way I dance
A
B
But don't nobody wanna play with me,
so I'm taking my fall and going home,
home
Em
I'm that guy, man,
shove a diamond up my hind end
And crush it with my butt muscles
while I cut vocals
Slut potholes in your shirt,
jump in mud puddles
While I stomp mud holes in your ass,
girl, now let's cuddle
Blood curdling,
you're gurgling on your blood puddle
I do for my next trick, I'm feeling wonderful
I think I might just do something a
little less subtle
Shove a fuckin' talker truck
up a little kid's butthole
Feel the wrath of a psychopath
slash ambassador of the
Valentine's Day
Massacre slash assassin
I slash her in the ass with a icicle
and leave her laying a bloodbath
While I put a catheter in
and jump in the bath with her
in my Spider -Man mask
Man, just imagine the fun
I can have with a strap -on
Stick it up Kim Kardashian's ass
and make the bitch run a triathlon
Are those pistachios?
Damn, I'd like to have some
Playing on the patio, man,
B
rolling a fat one
Shady drop the magic mark,
I put the cap on
Goddamn, man,
are you that much of an asshole?
Em
It feels so wrong, cause it feels so right
A
Em
But it's alright, it's okay with me
I'll do my steps all by myself
A
B
I don't need nobody to play with me
Em
But if you just give me a chance
G
I can put you in a trance the way I dance
A
B
But don't nobody wanna play with me
Bm
B
So I'm taking my ball and going home
Em
I'm like Houdini,
tuck my teeny -eeny -weeny
G
Em
between each one of my thighs and
make it disappear like a genie,
make this shit disappear like Tara
Reade in a bikini, believe me homie you don't
know the meaning of a meanie,
they call me the Fruit Loop
from Jupiter,
I'm tryna maneuver the Hoover up
in your poop chute,
don't move or you might
get it stuck
so fuckin' far up in your uvula,
you ain't gonna know what he was tryna do to your gluteus,
totally tubular,
sleeping glued to a tube in the studio,
now who do you think is more fruitier,
weenis
Smothered in peanut butter pudding
on a tube of your eye shadow
And man it look nice,
you should've seen it mother
I think I'll put a piece of art
on my visa card
Then I'll go beat Misha
Barton with a Cuisinart
B
Then mosey on over to Rosie
O'Donnell's with McDonald's
Jump in a lap and watch the soprano
Em
It feels so wrong cause it feels so right
A
Em
But it's alright, it's okay with me
I'll do my steps all by myself
A
B
I don't need nobody to play with me
Em
But if you just give me a chance
G
I can put you in a trance the way I dance
A
B
But don't nobody wanna play with me
Bm
B
So I'm taking my ball and going home,
home
Em
Shady, what are you doing
chewing on a human?
G
Grab an aluminum bat,
Em
hit Heidi Klum in the back
Bloomin', assuming the fact
that that dude's in the back room
Using the bathroom,
vacuuming a raccoon
Skewing a rat, a cat, screwing a baboon
You should've asked,
what is he doing with that broom?
You should be glad
he ain't leave you full of stab wounds
You in a trance, I'm back,
doing my dance, ooh
But they're afraid I might get Sarah
Palin by the hair
And make her wear a bathing suit
and take a pair of saline
Shady, what do you got
a pick on the lady for?
Why you make her read
84 bedtime stories to you
and baby talk?
Cause I'm scared,
there's monsters under my bed
Can we pick one,
hit my juice box under my bassinet?
B
No wonder my ass is wet,
my diaper needs to be changed
You like graffiti, Dyke?
Well I can pee -pee and write your name
Em
It feels so wrong,
cause it feels so right
A
Em
But it's alright, it's okay with me
I'll do my shit all by myself
A
B
I don't need nobody to play with me
Em
But if you just give me a chance
G
I can put you in a trance the way I dance
A
B
Bm
But don't nobody wanna play with me
B
So I'm taking my ball
and going home, home
Em
Fine, nobody wants to play with me?
Fuck you then, bitch
Guys are always mean to me anyways
All you ever do is rub gum
in my hair and stuff
You guys are going to make me,
B
make me sad, I'm sad, I'm going to cry, I'm crying,
Em
Em
B
I want to tell my mom, Mom!
Em
Outro 1
You
Em
Taking My Ball
Joell Ortiz
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