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Show Me The Way To Go Home chords by 
Johnny Bond
N/A•
Verse 1
D
And so there you have our first
night in the ballroom.
Now, the next night I went in,
things were just about the same.
E
A
Bm
Lots of people, lots of singing.
D
Show me the way to go home
G
D
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
C#
Had a little drink about an hour ago
D
E
A
And it's gone right to my head
D
Wherever I may roam
F#
On land or sea or far
D
You can always hear me
singing this song
Bm
E
D
Show me the way to go home
A friend of mine gave me ten little...
Oh, no, that's another song
F#
G
E
Every time I hear that one
C#
D
Oh, hey, bartender
E
C#
Ab
Oh, it's you, back again, huh?
C#
Why don't you have the band
play
Bm
D
my favorite song?
E
Bm
What is your favorite song?
D
E
I want a girl just like the girl
C#
D
that married Richard Burton
E
G
Oh yeah, that's our favorite song too.
D
F#
Oh no, I got that wrong.
Have them play
D
I Want a Girl Just Like the Girl
That Married Andrew Bates.
Bm
E
And just who is Andrew Bates?
D
E
He's a bachelor.
C#
E
Old Andrew used to come
D
over to my house
and borrow my lantern
F#
G
so he could go courting.
Lantern?
D
I never used a lantern.
Bm
C#
D
I even proposed in the dark.
Look what you got.
Bm
E
She's not so bad.
Bm
Here's a picture of her.
D
E
Is that your wife?
D
That's her in the flesh.
E
F#
Too bad she never had a better fitting.
D
G
F#
Is that makeup she's wearing
D
or is her skin just naturally curly?
Now listen son,
C#
Bm
you can't make fun
F#
E
at my wife's expense.
A
It ain't her expense,
D
C#
it's her expanse.
A
D
Forget about her size, look at her face.
G
Yeah, looks like her tonsils hollered fire
and her teeth tried to jump
D
out of her mouth.
Now wait a minute.
I bet she could eat corn off the cob
Bm
through a nothole.
E
Now listen shallow brain,
I'll have you know my
D
E
wife's ancestors
D
came over here on the Mayflower.
Is that right?
E
G
She must have been just a little bitty kid then.
D
E
F#
Now, just a minute there,
C#
E
D
tall, dark, and putrid.
I've taken just about enough of this.
I'll meet you outside
and we'll settle this thing once and for all.
You understand? I understand.
I'll be waiting outside.
And remember one thing,
I'm not afraid.
I'm not afraid either,
because I won't be there. ha, ha, ha.
E
D
Well, the bartender's gone.
Hey, everybody,
the drinks are on the house.
Let's have some more singing.
Verse 2
D
Show me the way to go home
Verse 3
G
D
I'm tired and I wanna go to bed
Verse 4
D
I had a little drink about an hour ago
Verse 5
E
A
And it's gone right to my head
Verse 6
D
Wherever I may roam
Verse 7
G
F#
On land or sea or foam
D
You can always hear me
Bm
singin' this song
E
A
D
Show me the way to go home
How did you like the song?
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