Mrs. Claus' Kimono chords by Drive-By Truckers

SimplifiedEm · Am · G · D · F …

GuitarPianoUkulele

Em
Am
G
D
F
A
Bm
Fm
Edim
Dm

Intro 1

Verse 1
Em 
I'm a sinister elf,
With a sinister plan,
D 
Em 
Santa's little helper,
D 
Em 
With too much time on my hands,
Am 
G 
He's got a fine lookin' wife,
D 
For such an old man,
F 
Em 
I can see her lookin' at me,
D 
Em 
When there is no one else around.
D 
Em 
D 
Em 
D 
Em 
And I'm countin' down the
D 
Em 
D 
days to December 24th,
Em 
The old mans in his sleigh,
D 
Em 
I am sneakin' in the back door,
Am 
A 
G 
She asks if I know what
D 
the candy cane is for,
F 
Em 
While he's slidin' down the chimney,
Bm 
Em 
I'll be  comin' back for more.
D 

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Verse 2
Em 
Not really worried 'bout
D 
Em 
the old man findin' out,
D 
Em 
Bm 
D 
'Cuz me  and Rudolph worked
Em 
the whole thing out,
Am 
A 
G 
It's not about vengeance
D 
or anything like that,
F 
Em 
I just want a little sex,
And the old man off my back.
D 
Em 

Verse 3
Rudy's out for blood,
'Cuz he hates the fat old man,
'Cuz he caught him in the stables
with his fat little hands

Verse 4
A 
G 
On a female reindeer he
D 
F 
likes named Wynona,
Em 
And the last thing he wants
D 
Em 
to see is Santa on her,
So we're loadin' up the toy sack
Bm 
Em 
Bm 
with heroin and crack

Verse 5
Em 
We sent Santa off to Georgia,
D 
Em 
He ain't comin' back,
Am 
G 
And we call up an evil green Grinch,
D 
Fm 
To tell him Santa's holdin',
Edim 
Em 
And they'll have him on the chain gang,
Bm 
Em 
And the electric chair,

Verse 6
The electric chair
Em 
And there'll be a happy ending,
D 
Em 
All you girls and all you boys
There won't be no more Santa,
Bm 
Em 
There won't be no more toys

Verse 7
A 
There'll be no stoppin'
G 
D 
F 
Rudy and Wynona,
Em 
And I'll be taking off Mrs. Claus' Kimono
I'll be taking off Mrs. Claus' Kimono
I'll be taking off Mrs. Claus' Kimono
I'll be taking off Mrs.
Am 
Claus' Kimono
G 
D 
Merry Christmas