When I try making money,
I never have much luck.
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Never earn a dime,
much less a buck.
Are my finances in a mess?
Yes.
But I never felt better,
so I couldn't care less.
I don't buy polo ponies,
or fly a private plane.
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Never order beer,
much less champagne.
But do I need a lot of dough?
No, cause I never felt better,
so I couldn't feel low.
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Not low, no, no,
I'm high, here's why.
I never have a worry, never have a care,
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about what I should buy
or what to wear.
And do I find my future bright, right?
Cause I never felt better
and I'm doing alright.
When
summer's at its hot test,
the rain must keep me cool
Cause I don't own a creek,
much less a pool
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What do I do when warm as toast?
Boast that I never felt better,
so I simply won't roast
When winter's at its coldest,
I shiver and I shake
Couldn't take a storm,
much less a quake
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But does that mean
I'm losing hope?
Nope!
Since I never felt better,
tell me why I should mope
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Why mope?
I'll cope
Won't cry
Not I
The days I go out shopping
I buy each thing I see I charge him,
then I feel I got him free.
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So where will I receive my mail?
Jail!
But I never felt better,
so I'm cruisin' full sail.
How's your ap petite?
Tre mendous.
How's your energy? Stupendous.
Are you strong?
So strong I have to watch my step.
How's your eyes?
Bright as a penny.
And your sleep?
I don't need any,
but I'm always on the ball
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and full of pep.
How's your heart?
It must be tickin'
cause I feel alive and kickin'.
How's your brain?
Well, it's insane, but kind of quick
How's your love life?
I got plenty
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How's your vis ion?
2020 must confess that I'm
depressingly un -sick
If I'm to cross the ocean,
better learn to float
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Can't afford a raft,
much less a boat
But will I love to see Paris?
Oui!
Still, I never felt better,
so Pomona suits me
Heidelberg would thrill me,
can't wait to book the flight
In Lederhosen,
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I'd be quite a sight.
But will I ever cross the Rhine?
Nein!
But I feel so good,
Chicago will be perfectly fine.
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No Rhine.
No Rome.
No place like home.
I haven't gotta worry,
haven't gotta care
About what I should buy
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or what to wear
Got no diamond stick pin, so what?
You know what?
I consider diamonds kinda square
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Besides, I never felt better
I never felt better
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I never felt better
An d I'm walking
It's all I can do to keep from
yelling at the end,
you know, I just want to yell.
Michael Feinstein 
