you want to be a ladies' man,
let me tell you how to do it.
Just listen to me while I lay it on thick.
you'll have to beat them off with a stick.
Now, first you go in the bathroom
and you take a nice cold shower.
Don't stay in the water too long,
say about three quarters of an hour.
Now plaster your crew cut down good
with some of that greasy kid stuff.
about half a pint ought to be enough.
I mean to tell you that's slick.
Go over to a used car lot now
and pick out the oldest Model T there.
Don't pay more than five bucks for it.
Be sure some of the tires hold air.
by her house fifty times or more
and beat a hammer on the tin door
you drive off and look the other way
Pardon me, wrong number, you say
and don't call her back for
Don't stay on the phone too long now.
Two or three hours ought to get it.
Tell her you're looking in
and you got two nights open next May.
But say if a cancellation comes through,
you'll let her know right away.
Then you lift the receiver
That'll throw her off the track.
cause she'll be coming over
Make faces at her through the window
Now you got her chasing after you.
After all, this is the very thing
Well, you guys all run along now
and have a good time dating.
Me, I'll just sit home by my