I'm a feminine Eminem, a slim shady lady
But nice cause I texted Haiti
and I'm arrested for doing 80
Like hamlet, all about "words, words, words"
Divide a whole into thirds, thirds, thirds
I blow other dudes out of the water
I'm the man muffin, divin', muffin
Cold and fly like an arctic puffin
Hatin other rappers like I'm Helga Pataki
And I've been rockin this mic
Way back in a thousand BCE
that's before the common era
(era, era, era, era, era)
flow so sick that it should be mopped up
I gotta dick full of helium, I'll fuck you up
A boy, a girl, a middle aged bitch,
botox in the third person
a switch and Bo talks in the third person
Just relax, if you wanna know me,
I had sex with her all day
so I ended up doin the YM CA
We ballin', Asian, Wii bowlin',
prostate cancer semi-colon
Find that hole like I'm Stephen Hawking
Atticus Finch, killing, mocking
your pole into Rolie Polie Olie's colon
I take a walk by the clock
and Rhymin', mathematical timin',
syntax impacts the intact hymen
I'm an internet provider,
came from the web like a horny spider
Fucked a girl in an apple orchard,
I thought AIDS was a butt virus
like conjunction junction conjunctivitis
cause I was molested by my uncle Midas
Gay dads blow pops, another sucker
Jose, we're not talking to you, esse
We got a border in order to keep you out
It's what my NYU essay's about
Cause we're, xenophobic warrior princess
Molested by my uncle sam, is that incest?
"I want you" to smell my finger
Does my nephew's scent still linger?
South of queers, north of hell
and the brown one's smell
We guard the border and we guard it well
But some slip through the cracks
hey you better let that rock go
Cause in real life goliath wins
And then sells all the silk
Bitches and hoes, Bo's hoes, oh,
bitches and hoes, bitches, hoes
Bitches and hoes don't exist
because the hoes know Bo's a feminist
Bitches and hoes don't exist
because the hoes know Bo's a feminist
So take off your bras and burn em
or you can let me burn em
And take off your bras and burn em,
or you can let Bo Burnham burn em
take off your bras and burn em
or you can or you can let me burn em
And take off your bras and burn em,
burn em or you can let Bo Burnham burn em
Bitches and hoes, bitches hoes)