You've got to be a member
You can't get a word in edgewise
Unless you shout above the pen
Your heart's gotta be in the wrong place
The tension's gotta be thin
Don't fall for the old trap
You're not working for the vanity press
Can you deliver something
Gotta have more hoes than
Gotta be a puff piece that
Have the boy next door and
Of getting married to the
You've got to own every channel
If you wanna own every mind
You gotta wear a skirt by
If you want to make the next issue,
you better get your skates on, boy.
With a premise as thin as tissue,
you're bound to get employed.
Now you're working for the vanity press,
need a conscience on the editor's desk.
You gotta back up your facts
Gotta be a piece that only shows the best
Of being better than the one next door
They can bump you over through
Send you over to the boys next door
If you wanna make the deadline
Make sure your line is dead
If you got any bright ideas
Cause you're working for the very best
Now the anti -media is the vanity press
you can't invent the rest
That's all you need to pass the test
And sell it to the guy next door
Now the anti -media is the vanity press
So sell it to the guy next door
Sell it to the guy next door
You gotta sell it to the guy next door
Yeah, sell it to the guy next door
You gotta sell it to the guy next door
Sell it to the guy next door
Meanwhile, I'm still thinkin'
Yeah, me and my jaw dropped
Sell it, you better sell it
Sell it to the guy next door
We are out workin' for the vanity press
I'm going to do something from,
Figs' as well, they play on it.
That's, you know, where the sort of, you know,
I try to write all these dumb songs, you know,
but it's turned out to be a bit
Clever lads, clever, clever lads.
We're going to do something from
This one, the figs were just, you know,
figlets when I made this album.
Rosenberg, was just a twinkle in his
dad's eye when I made this album.
In fact, this shirt is older than
I found it in the attic the
other day, pulled it out.
These pants I found as well, they're getting a bit thin here,
you can see my leg through
They're probably older than
Brett as well, so you know,
some relics up here, well there's
a relic up here on stage,