Stuart chords by The Dead Milkmen

  • D

  • A

  • G

  • Bm

    2
  • F#

    2
  • F

  • C

Verse 1
D
You know what, Stuart,
A
G
A
I LIKE YOU. You're not like the other
D
People, here, in the trailer park.
Verse 2
A
Oh, don't go get me wrong. They're fine people,
they're
G
A
Bm
Good Americans. But they're con tent to sit back,
G
maybe
D
F#
Watch a little Mork and Mindy on
Bm
G
D
channel 57, maybe kick
F#
Bm
G
D
Back a cool, Coors 16-ouncer. They're good,
fine people,
F#
Bm
G
Stu art. But they don't know
D
... what the queers are doing
To the soil!
A
Verse 3
D
You know that Jonny Wurster kid, the
kid that delivers papers
A
In the neighborhood. He's a foreign
G
A
kid. Some of the neighbors
D
Say he smokes crack,
but I don't believe it.
Verse 4
A
Anyway, for his tenth birthday,
G
A
all he wanted was a Burrow Owl.
Bm
G
D
Kept bugging his old man. "Dad,
F#
Bm
get me a burrow owl. I'll never
G
D
Ask for anything else as long
F#
Bm
as I live." So the guy
G
Breaks down and buys
D
him a burrow owl.
F#
Anyway,
Verse 5
Bm
G
D
10:30, the other night,
I go out in my yard, and there's
A
The Wurster kid, looking up in the tree. I say,
"What are
You looking for?" He says
F
"I'm looking for my burrow owl."
G
C
F
I say, "Jumping Jesus on a
C
Pogo Stick. Everybody knows
F
C
The burrow owl lives. In a hole. In
F
the ground. Why the hell do you
C
Think they call it a burrow owl,
G
anyway?" Now Stuart, do you
Think a kid like that is going to know
D
what the queers are
Doing to the soil?
Verse 6
A
G
I first became aware of this about ten years ago,
A
the summer
D
My oldest boy,
Bill Jr. died. You know that carnival comes into
A
Town every year? Well this year they
G
A
came through with a ride
Bm
G
Called The Mixer. The man said,
D
F#
Bm
"Keep your head, and arms, inside
G
D
The Mixer at all times." But Bill Jr,
Bm
G
he was a DAAAREDEVIL, just
D
F#
Bm
Like his old man. He was leaning out
G
saying "Hey everybody,
D
Look at me! Look at me!" Pow! He
A
was decapitated! They found
F
His head over by the snow
G
cone concession.
Verse 7
C
A few days after that,
F
C
I open up the mail. And there's a pamphlet
F
In there. From Pueblo, Colorado,
C
and it's addressed to Bill, Jr.
F
And it's entitled,
C
G
"Do you know what the queers are doing to our
Verse 8
Soil?"
G
D
Now, Stuart, if you look at the soil
around any large US city,
A
G
There's a big undeground homosexual
A
D
population. Des Moines, Iowa,
For an example. Look at the soil around Des Moines,
A
Stuart.
G
A
You can't build on it; you can't grow
Bm
anything in it. The gov ernment
G
D
Says it's due to poor farming. But
F#
Bm
I know what's really going on,
G
D
Stuart. I know it's the queers.
F#
Bm
They're in it with the aliens.
G
D
F#
Bm
G
They're building landing strips for gay Martians,
D
I swear to
God.
Verse 9
A
You know what, Stuart,
I like you. You're not like the other
D
People, here in this trailer park.
N/A
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