I can be the hot dog and you can chords by
Ivor Biggun

N/A

Simplified

Tabs

Key: A major•

Verse 1

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I'm 37,

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I'm still living with me mum,

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I've no pals now, my guinea pig's dead,

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and my dad needs my room

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to grow mushrooms,

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so I suppose that it's time I was wed.

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Now you don't sweat much for a fat lass,

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and I hear you've a rich mum and dad,

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And in the dark,

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with the light right behind you,

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you really don't look quite that bad.

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And that's why I wrote you

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this meaningful melody.

Okay lads, three chords in the key of A,

let's put some spunk into it.

I can be the hot dog

and you can be the bun.

I can be the ramrod

and you can be the gun.

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I can be the cistern

if you will pull my chain.

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I can be the dino -rod

if you will be the drain

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I'll even be the daddy

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and you can be the mum

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I can be the suppository

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and you can be the bum

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But I can't understand

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No, he can't understand

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No, I can't understand

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why women don't like me

It's one of life's little mysteries

No, I can't understand

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No, he can't understand

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No, I can't understand

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why women don't like me

Oh, cruel fate!

I can be the Christmas fairy,

you can be the tinsel

I can be the athlete's foot

and you can be the plimsoll

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I can be the landlord's thumb

and you can be the drink

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I can be the plunger

and you can be the sink

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I will be the dentist

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if you will open wide

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I can be the vet's rubber glove

and you can be the cow's backside

But I can't understand

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No, it can't understand

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Now I can't understand

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why women don't like

Dear Anna Raeburn,

what am I doing wrong?

Now I can't understand

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No, he can't understand

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Now I can't understand

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why women don't like me

I've got the brew cream's browns

You can be the sandwich,

I can be the lemon curd

You can be the WC and I can be the turd

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I can be the rupture

and you can be the truss

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You can be the pimple

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and I can be the pus

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You can be the vomitbag

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and I can be the trim

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You can be the Y Front

and I can be the...

What's this word?

I can't understand!

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No, he can't understand!

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No! I can't understand

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why women don't like

I 've got the old teeth

and a motorbike inside

No! I can't understand!

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No, he can't understand!

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No! I can't understand

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why women don't like me!

me, me, me...

I can be the finger,

and you can be the pie.

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I can be the poker,

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and you can be the stye.

I can be the writing,

if you will be the wall.

I can do the breaststroke,

if you will do the crawl.

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You can be the racing car,

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and I can be James Hunt.

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I can be the sailor,

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and you can be the...

What's this word?

Mr Biggin, the word is hunt.

Are you sure?

I can be the stone,

and you can be the kidney.

You can be the choir boy,

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and I can be my rather

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strange Uncle Sidney.

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But if your heart should chance

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resist my subtlety and charms,

and my suave sophistication

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fails to bring you to my arms,

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You'd be the wild and lovely girl

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I'd lost before she'd grown

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And you will be a memory,

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and I will be...

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Probably going down the pub

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There's a darts match on at the

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Swan in Fulham Broadway

Or I might go to the pictures

and see Clit Eastwood

Or Danish dentist on the job

Or I might go and stare

at the nurses playing tennis

Or I might go and get some Algerian

Scotch whisky from the off -licence

And get Kermode hugging drunk

Or I might go and stick me gong

Outro 1

through somebody's letterbox

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TunerE A D G B E

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ChordsA D G Bm E...

A
D
G
Bm
E
C
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Capo: 2

Transpose: 0

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Chords

A
D
G
Bm
E
C
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Capo: 2

Transpose: 0

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I can be the hot dog and you can chords by Ivor Biggun Save Print

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I can be the hot dog and you can chords by
Ivor Biggun