How to Be Dumb

How to Be Dumb easy guitar chords by Elvis Costello

N/A•
Guitar
Tuning

E A D G B E

Capo

No capo

Capo

Transpose

0

Capo

  • D

  • G

  • Em

  • Bm

    2

  • F

  • C

  • E

  • Am

  • D

  • G

  • Em

  • Bm

    2

  • F

  • C

  • E

  • Am

    • Verse 1
    D
    G

    I was hell-bent on on destroying

    my powers of concentration
    D

    While you were living like a saint
    G

    And all the time the very one you
    Em

    trusted was washing off
    Bm

    Somebody else's paint
    Verse 2
    G

    Now you've got yourself a

    brand new occupation
    D

    Every fleeting thought is a pearl
    G

    And beautiful people

    stampede to the doorway
    Em

    Of the funniest fucker in
    Bm
    F

    the world
    Verse 3
    D

    They're here to help you
    Bm

    Satisfy your desire
    C

    There's a bright future for
    Verse 4

    all you professional liars
    G

    [Chorus]
    C
    D

    Now you know how to be dumb
    G
    C

    Are you ready to take your place in the
    G
    D

    modern museum of mistakes?
    G
    C
    Bm

    Don't you know how to be dumb?
    G
    C

    Like a building thrown up overnight in
    G
    D

    one of those reverse earthquakes
    Verse 5
    G

    They emptied out all the asylums,
    D

    they emptied out all the jails
    G

    The "new bruise" was

    the name of a dance craze
    Em

    By "Jesus cross and the
    Bm
    G

    cruel nails"

    Followed up by "torturing little beaver"
    D

    With their contraption of barbed wire
    G
    Em

    Between the fear and the fever lies all the
    Bm
    F

    rejection they require

    They'll be howling by midnight,
    D

    they'll be drooling by dawn
    Bm

    Skulls shrunk down to the
    C

    size of their brains
    Interlude 1

    Heads shaven and shorn
    G
    C
    D
    G
    C

    G
    D
    G
    C
    Bm
    G
    C

    G
    D

    Verse 6
    E

    [Chorus]

    Trapped in the house of the

    perpetual sucker
    Am

    Where bitterness always
    D
    G
    E

    ends so pitifully

    You always had to dress up your envy
    Am

    in some half-remembered

    Philosophy
    D
    G

    Philosophy
    Verse 7
    G

    Now you're masquerading as

    pale powdered genius
    D

    Whose ever bad intention has been purged
    G

    You could've walked out any time
    Em

    you wanted but face it you
    Bm

    Didn't have the courage
    G

    I guess that makes you a full time
    D

    hypocrite or some kind of

    Twisted dilettante
    G

    Funny though people don't usually
    Em

    get so ugly 'til they think
    Bm
    F

    They know what they want

    Scratch your own head stupid
    D
    Bm

    Count up to three
    C

    Roll over on your back

    Repeat after me
    G
    Don't you know
    Verse 8
    C
    D

    how to be dumb?
    G
    C

    Are you ready to take your place in the
    G
    D

    modern museum of mistakes?
    G
    C

    Don't you know how to be dumb?
    Bm
    G
    C
    G
    D

    Like a building thrown up overnight in one of those reverse earthquakes
    Outro 1
    D
    G
    C

    D
    G
    C

    D
    G
    C
    D
    G

    C
    D
    G
    C
    D
    G

    C
    D
    G
    C
    D
    G

    C
    D
    G
    C
    D
    G

    C
    D
    G
    C
    D
    G

    C
    D
    G
    D


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