If you want boring conversation
Then darling, I'm your man
If you need lack of motivation
If you want someone substandard
Then just give me that look
If I could count the ways
I think I could write a book
Burn my face off with gasoline,
put my head inside a guillotine
Bury me alive in asbestos,
run me over with a giant bus
Roll me down with a shotgun shell
It doesn't matter if it hurts like hell
Just trying to be with you Caroline
Feels like a hundred ways to die
When we talked reincarnation,
you said I shouldn't come back at all
But if you find you need a Star Trek film,
I tried a hundred ways to make you smile,
and you destroyed them all
Burn my face off with gasoline,
put my head inside a guillotine
Bury me alive in asbestos,
run me over with a giant bus
Hold me down with a shotgun shell,
it doesn't matter if it hurts like hell
Feels like a hundred ways to die
No, it never started out like this
No, it never started out like this
But somehow it ended up like this
it's probably all my fault
Burn my face off with gasoline
Put my head inside a guillotine
Bury me alive in asbestos
Run me over with a giant bus
Roll me down with a shotgun shell
It doesn't matter if it hurts like hell
Just trying to live with you, Caroline
Feels like a hundred ways to die
Leave me naked outside in the cold
Tie me down on a railway track
Stop me in the heart of Amber Valley
Boys and me sleeping in our bed
Cause for one day with you, Caroline
Feels like a hundred ways to die