Betty And Me chords by
Jonathan Coulton
Jonathan Coulton

N/A
Key: A major
Verse 1
G
G

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F
F

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G
G

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F
F

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G
G

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F
F

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G
G

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I guess I was skeptical
when I first met Dr. Martin
F
F

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G
G

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He said, "We could build
a baby out of DNA"
C
C

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And although it was expensive,
G
G

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F
F

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G
G

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it was legal in the states where it wasn't banned
D
D

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It was Betty who suggested we cut out
C
C

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Bb
Bb

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G
G

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the parts of me that she can't stand
F
F

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So,
Verse 2
C
C

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G
G

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Em
Em

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we made an appointment
G
G

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A
A

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and Betty went alone
Em
Em

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They worked out the details
G
G

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A
A

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and then called me on the phone
Am
Am

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D
D

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To say, "Congratulations, Dad"
G
G

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Now things
Verse 3
D
D

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are getting better
C
C

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G
G

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for Betty an d me
D
D

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C
C

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We're making us a baby that's just
G
G

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Em
Em

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like me only better
A
A

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Em
Em

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A
A

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And Betty says he'll be taller, and Betty
Em
Em

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says he'll be smarter
A
A

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And Betty says that our baby will
D
D

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G
G

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F
F

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G
G

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be better than me
Verse 4
G
G

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Betty was pretty firm about
F
F

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our baby being human
G
G

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I said, "We should give him wings
and a nice prehensile tail
C
C

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He could travel with the circus making money,
G
G

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F
F

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G
G

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making friends with clowns"
D
D

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C
C

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Betty said, "That's stupid and, for God's sake,
Bb
Bb

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G
G

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F
F

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C
C

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G
G

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would you turn that TV down?"
Em
Em

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Now I've seen Betty happy,
Verse 5
G
G

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A
A

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but she's never been like this
Em
Em

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She glows like someone's girlfriend
G
G

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A
A

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in the middle of a kiss
Am
Am

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D
D

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And I'm excited too
G
G

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'Cause things are getting bet
Verse 6
D
D

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ter
C
C

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G
G

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for Betty an d me
D
D

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C
C

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We're making us a baby that's just
G
G

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Em
Em

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like me only better
A
A

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Em
Em

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And Betty says he'll be taller,
A
A

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Em
Em

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and Betty says he'll be smarter
A
A

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And Betty says that our baby will
D
D

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G
G

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F
F

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C
C

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G
G

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be better than me
Verse 7
Bb
Bb

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And the love inside me thunders
G
G

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like a storm
Bb
Bb

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And I hope the tube they keep him in
G
G

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is comfortable and warm
Bb
Bb

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C
C

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I hope the nutritive solution that they're feeding
D
D

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him doesn't make him fat
G
G

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Betty's been spending lots
Verse 8
G
G

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of time out late with Dr. Martin
F
F

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G
G

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She says that they're working
on the baby every night
C
C

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And Dr. Martin sends her presents like
G
G

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F
F

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G
G

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new underwear and a bottle of wine
D
D

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I'll just keep on writing checks until
C
C

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Bb
Bb

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G
G

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F
F

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G
G

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the day that baby is mine
Em
Em

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He might have my mustache
Verse 9
G
G

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A
A

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or my freckles or my eyes
Em
Em

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Betty thinks it's better
A
A

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if we keep it a surprise
Am
Am

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D
D

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I hope I find out soon
G
G

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'Cause things are getting bet
Verse 10
D
D

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ter
G
G

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C
C

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G
G

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for Betty an d me
D
D

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We're making us a baby that's just
C
C

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G
G

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Em
Em

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like me only better
A
A

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Em
Em

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And Betty says he'll be taller,
A
A

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Em
Em

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and Betty says he'll be smarter
A
A

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And Betty says that our baby
Am
Am

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D
D

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will be better than
Am
Am

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D
D

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Baby will be better than
Am
Am

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D
D

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G
G

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Baby will be better than me

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TunerE A D G B E
ChordsG F C D Bb...

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