My Wife Is On A Diet chords by
Eddie Cantor

N/A

Key: F major•

Verse 1
F F 
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Bb Bb 
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F F 
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Bb Bb 
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Listen,
C C 
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F F 
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what's the greatest problem
C C 
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now throughout the land?
F F 
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What's the only problem
C C 
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F F 
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needs a helping hand?
Bb Bb 
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A A 
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Dm Dm 
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It isn't prohibition or farm relief I find.
F F 
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C C 
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It's something more
important now
on everybody's mind.
Just walk into any home today.
G G 
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It's ten to one,
F F 
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C C 
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you'll hear each husband say.
F F 
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My wife is on a diet,
and since she's on a diet,
G G 
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home isn't home anymore.
C C 
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Bb Bb 
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No gravy and potatoes,
C C 
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F F 
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G G 
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just lettuce and tomatoes.
C C 
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F F 
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Where are the pies I adore?
Bb Bb 
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Oh, oh, oh, oh, what a disgrace.
F F 
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I'm ashamed to look a
Dm Dm 
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C C 
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grapefruit straight in the face.
F F 
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My wife is on a diet,
and since she's on a diet,
Dm Dm 
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F F 
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C C 
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F F 
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I'm losing  a pound every day.
C C 
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Monday, grapefruit,
F F 
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Bb Bb 
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breakfast  and for din ner,
C C 
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F F 
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G G 
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and at night some orange juice.
F F 
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C C 
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Tuesday, grapefruit.
F F 
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Bb Bb 
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Boys, I'm growing thinner.
F F 
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All my clothes are getting loose.
Bb Bb 
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Wednesday, Thursday.
F F 
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Then I feel satisfied.
Dm Dm 
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Bb Bb 
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Cause then I change to coffee
G G 
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C C 
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with grapefruit on the side.
F F 
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From Friday to Sunday
is more than I can stand.
Bdim Bdim 
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G G 
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F F 
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be     fore the 18th day,
C C 
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F F 
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Eb Eb 6
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F F 
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I'll have a lily in my  hand.
My wife is on a diet.
She tries to keep it quiet,
C C 
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but she looks like the deuce.
G G 
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What used to be her fender
G G 
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G G 
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is growing thin and slender.
F F 
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Even her bumper is loose.
Bb Bb 
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Round her chassis,
she's not the same.
G G 
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Why, you can even see the bolts
Dm Dm 
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C C 
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that hold up her frame.
My wife is on a diet,
F F 
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Dm Dm 
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and since she's on a di  et,
C C 
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F F 
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I never go home anymore.